On the way to work this morning, I felt a sharp, hot, stabbing pain in the flesh besides my right knee. At first I thought it was just a bad example of a hair getting caught in the trouser material, but upon further investigation (I stopped and rolled up the trousers when a jiggle provided no relief) I felt a similar pain on the edge of my left buttock. With my lightning reflexes, I pinched the trousers where the pain occurred, shook the trouser leg and out dropped a wasp, ripe for the stamping on.
The rest of the journey was somewhat uncomfortable as the second sting is right where sitting down produces the most pressure.
As I arrived at the station with mere minutes until I was due at work I texted my boss with the following message:
I’m going to be about ten minutes late this morning – I got stung on the arse by a wasp and need to get cream from the chemist’s.
In response I received typed laughter and the affirmation that I had submitted the best excuse for lateness ever.
I now have ointment but it’s not helping much.
Here endeth the story of my painful encounter with nature in an urban setting.